oooo. This feels like fun.
1. Outside of standard benefits, what benefits should a company offer employees?
Whatever the market and law dictates. Also, if they want to attract the best candidates, they PROBABLY need to be a place to work that offers better than the bare minimum, but whatev.
2. What should the national minimum wage be?
That's a tough one- and I don't think it's necessarily one I have the expertise for. My immediate gut-check reaction is that all jobs should maintain a standard wage that, at full time, would be above the federal poverty levels. But that doesn't take into account inflation, regional differences, blah blah blah. It also is overly simplistic in terms of an answer and fails to adequately reflect the difficulties of making a national rule about wages that are by nature disparate across the country.
3. How many sick days should be given to employees?
Unlimited. "lol but people will abuse that" no shit, sherlock. That's what performance reviews and doctors office notes are for.
4. How often should employees get raises?
Annual cost-of-living adjustments should be standard for most companies, and annual performance increases as merited (with quarterly performance reviews informally at a minimum so people aren't blindsided).
5. How do you feel about guns?
Guns? Meh. Whatev. They exist. Gun owners are usually fine, too. Does that matter?
6. What are your feelings about employees or clients carrying guns?
Depends on the environment. I can tell you that in every office I've ever worked in, there was always "that one guy" that NO ONE would have wanted to be carrying a gun.
7. What are your feelings about safe spaces in challenging work environments?
Like... a comfy couch on an oil rig? Or do you mean sort of like an HR department that takes tangible steps to keep sexual and racial harassment minimized? I mean, I like comfy couches.
8. In a creative environment like The Silent Partner Marketing, what do you envision work attire looking like?
Seriously? Are you my mommy? Since when does my attire affect my output?
OH WAIT - more importantly - am I client facing? If so, what does the client expect or care about? If I'm not, fuck off.
9. Should “trigger warnings” be issued before we release content for clients or the company that might be considered “controversial”?
If we are releasing content that might, you know, trigger PTSD in a rape victim or a person recently discharged from the military, then MAAAAYBE we want to warn them, you know, as a responsible decent group of citizens? Does that REALLY bother you to do so? I mean, do I need a trigger warning for trigger warnings so that people who get offended by the idea of giving a heads-up to people who might need it don't get offended? (I had to reread that 3 times in order to get the grammar right, btw, so someone better have read it)
10. How do you feel about police?
Invaluable to the safety of a community.
Absolutely in need of improvements.
Always there when you don't want them to be.
Some of them are really great people. Some of them are real assholes. Most of them are in between.
11. If you owned the company and were to find out that a client is operating unethically but was a high paying client…how would you handle it?
Can you give me a specific example? I mean, in general, drop em like a hot potato, but I don't know if you're saying "they lied about their CEO getting her mom a birthday card" or "they intentionally allowed a defect in their car to exist that was responsible for deaths".
12. When was the last time you cried and why?
Really cried? Seeing Deafheaven at the Shelter from about 10 feet away. Tears in my eyes through most of the set. Also, got kicked in the head a lot.
13. You arrive at an event for work and there’s a major celebrity you’ve always wanted to meet. What happens next?
Depends on what I'm there for. If I'm intended to network and talk a lot, I try to figure out who can intro me and have a quick convo if it doesn't seem intrusive. Otherwise, I gawk from the sidelines like a normal plebe.
14. What’s your favorite kind of adult beverage?
I'm really partial to good bourbons and ryes... but.... beer too. Beer is really good. And wine. I like wine. OH! And scotch. Scotchy scotch scotch scotch.
15. What’s the best way to communicate with clients?
In their preferred methods.
16. What’s your favorite thing to do in your free time?
Answer Myspace Surveys.
17. What are your thoughts on the current college environment as it pertains to a future workforce?
Depends on the job. Doctors, for example? Fucking rocking. Scientists and researchers? Depends on the school, but mostly awesome. Engineers? Same. I dunno, what are you looking for? Like, a blanket condemnation of liberal arts or something? One of the directors here has an MFA in creative writing, should I stop respecting her abilities?
18. What’s your typical breakfast?
Homemade bread and almond / cashew butter. Or whatever's laying around - boiled eggs, leftover oatmeal, frosted flakes.
19. What’s your favorite drink when you go to a coffeehouse?
Coffee. Preferably pourover of fresh beans. Sometimes espresso.
20. How do you handle bullies?
Are there bullies in this office I should know about that you haven't fired?
21. How do you handle it when your ideas are shot down?
Move on. I have lots of terrible ideas.
22. What do you do if a coworker comes to the table with an idea and it sucks?
Depends on the coworker relationship. Probably game it out and see if I'm wrong first, and hopefully they see they're wrong. OR there are a billion nice ways of redirecting an idea without being a total asshole. You know.
23. What does the first amendment mean to you?
I tend to be a Jeffersonian Separatist.
24. What does faith mean to you?
fāTH / noun
1. complete trust or confidence in someone or something.
"this restores one's faith in politicians"
synonyms: trust, belief, confidence, conviction;
2. strong belief in God or in the doctrines of a religion, based on spiritual apprehension rather than proof.
synonyms: religion, church, sect, denomination, (religious) persuasion, (religious) belief, ideology, creed, teaching, doctrine
"she gave her life for her faith"
25. Who is your role model and why?
My mom, my dad, my brothers, my wife, my kids, my friends, and my neighbors.
Because everyone has something to teach me.
26. “You’re in Starbucks with two friends. Someone runs in and says someone is coming in with a gun in 15 seconds to shoot patrons. They offer you a gun. Do you take it? What do you do next?”
Wait. I have 15 seconds? I get everyone the fuck out of the building. There's a back door. I do NOT take the gun, because I'm completely untrained and unlikely to use it effectively in an emergency situation.
27. What does America mean to you?
It's a collection of 50 states and a shitload of people.
28. You see someone stepping on an American flag. What do you do?
Context? I mean, was it painted on a football field or on the uniform of an NFL player? Probably busy cheering my Ravens on and drinking a beer. Why?
29. What does “privilege” mean to you?
1. a special right, advantage, or immunity granted or available only to a particular person or group of people.
"education is a right, not a privilege"
synonyms: advantage, benefit; More
verb / formal
1. grant a privilege or privileges to.
"English inheritance law privileged the eldest son"
30. What’s more important? Book smarts or street smarts? Why?
The fact that you ask that question tells me everything I needed to know. I can outsmart you in both.